So you think classical music is just for stuffy old people or pretentious young people? Guess again. The classical composers of old were the rock stars of their age. Freaks, even. They were the Jim Morrisons and Kurt Cobains of a time when the viola and harpsichord were like the electric guitar of today.
Kids, these are the things they don’t teach you in middle school music class.
Keep reading to find out which classical composers were the true rock star freaks of their age.
For starters, Mozart was a huge pervert.
Think the embodiment of The Bloodhound Gang of 18th Century Austria.
He wrote dirty humorous letters to his family members, such as this one to his own cousin:
“Well, I wish you good night
But first shit into your bed and make it burst.
Sleep soundly, my love
Into your mouth your arse you’ll shove.”
He also wrote a piece of music including this line:
“Leck mich im A[rsch] g’schwindi, g’schwindi!”
Which translates to: “lick me in the arse/ass, quickly, quickly!”
Peter Ilyich Tchaikovsky was like the Metallica of mid 1800’s Russia.
He called for actual canons to be fired during certain parts of the “1812 Overture“. People got so amped up over the performance that they all but started rioting.
The US tries to claim it as a patriotic piece, popular during 4th of July fireworks. Tchaikovsky himself has said that it’s actually about how Napoleon failed his attack on Russia, only to get his ass kicked by the Russian winter.