Doctors Surgically Remove $280,000 Diamond From Thief’s Body
The song “Diamonds Are a Girl’s Best Friend” was written for the 1949 Broadway production of Gentlemen Prefer Blondes; given the age, it’s entirely possible that an update to said song is in order. There’s at least one woman out there who feels that way — because one botched attempt at thievery turned into a very unpleasant doctor visit.
Originally, the plan would have had Jiang Xulian swap out a Thai diamond — one that weighed in at six carats — with a fake, while she and her cohort made off with the real diamond she swallowed. Unfortunately, they were caught on camera and identified by the dealer at the jewelry fair they visited. Worse yet, Xulian couldn’t get the diamond to come out; once police gave her an X-ray and found the diamond lodged in her colon, she had to have surgery to get it removed.
Despite her best efforts and historical precedents, Xulian couldn’t quite make it the perfect crime. That’s to be expected when it comes to bodily functions, but what matters is that the diamond made it back safely, justice was served, and everyone learned not to overestimate their colons.